I’ve spent years studying the depths of myself. I used to think that I would reach a day where I had it all figured out. In reality, we can conclude that one can never know it all. We all have the ability to learn something new everyday. The limit is infinite. The same phenomenon applies within: the study of oneself will never reach a finite conclusion… It’s like a void.
Both you, I and life have an infinite amount of depth waiting for us to explore.
Before I go any further I’ll leave you with something that was a hard pill for me to swallow and understand- it may be for you as well.
First and foremost, change will only happen when you decide to fully commit.
There’s an old saying:
“You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink.”
I can share with you my experience and what I’ve gathered. So can your friends and family, your boss, a mentor, or some jo- shmo you ran into on the street… You can seek advice near and far but truthfully its neither here nor there. It’s up to you to ultimately decide whether or not you will choose to drink from the well at which you've been lead to.
When you know change is necessary but don’t know where to begin.
To paint the scene:
Let’s represent your life path or whatever it is you are seeking to change as simply a long road trip. And your destination we can call either your “higher self” or whichever place you envision this change leading you to. This trip is meant to be fun and exciting but there are indeed a few limitations. Before you set off, you’ll be given one backpack. It’s not any ordinary backpack- think of it kind of like a Mary Poppins bag. So what can you bring? Well… the bag came with a manual which also includes a list of rules on what it will and will not allow you to store in it. You’ll need to travel as light as possible and make sure you leave a lot of room for all of the “souvenirs” or maybe “gifts” you’d like to bring back home with you. So, what are the rules? What do you have to do to prepare and what are some things you should know?
#1: Get yourself a notebook and something to write with.
Sounds silly, but don’t just pick up any old notebook. Find one that aligns with you and the goal you have. This new notebook is going to become your best friend and your most sacred prized possession.
Example: One of my changes/goals was to heal childhood traumas and also tap further into my inner child. Who I was as a kid, what I liked and disliked, what my imagination was like, what my dreams were, who I wanted to become, etc. So I got a notebook that was one I thought 5 year old me would’ve went bananas over. It was silly, but it had a purpose. It aligned exactly with my goal at hand.
#2: You can only bring what you have been given for free.
Yourself and your mind.
(Don’t get hung up on this one just yet.)
#3: You will not have a “GPS.”
A tangible GPS that is. Though it may not look like so, you already have an extremely valuable GPS. You will learn exactly what this means once you get on the road.
#4: The “bag” will only open at the right times and the right places. It will also only allow you to place certain things in it once you get going.
It’s magic.
(Again don’t get hung up on this one, trust.)
Gather everything up and look at the things you have infront of you.
You have:
A goal/destination.
A “magic Mary Poppins bag”- with a manual.
A notebook and something to write with.
Yourself.
Your mind.
Before you get going, grab your notebook. I want you to write on the first page what it is that notebook represents. Whatever change it is that you're making or goal you have for yourself.
On the second page, I want you to start writing your why. What is the reasoning behind this change?
Next, write down a list of things and beliefs that will benefit you on this journey. Then, write down a list of things and beliefs that will weigh you down.
After that, I want you to write a message to your future self. A loving and optimistic message. You can even write about your current feelings and any other thoughts you have that you will then be able to look back on in the future and see just how far you’ve come. Spend a lot of time here. Get vulnerable. Maybe you have some fears, doubts or self-limiting beliefs. Remember this is your notebook and it does not have to be shared with anyone else unless you so choose.
Next, zoom out. Look at everything you’ve just written. Read between the lines. Analyze everything and try to notice any patterns. Write those down too.
Lastly, if you did all of the above, I want you to congratulate yourself. Why? Well without even realizing it, you already started your road trip. And you started driving without a tangible GPS. You followed a few “street signs” which are essentially the outlines I just gave you. And your GPS? Well that is you and the words you now have in front of you that you’ve just written. The fact of the matter is, it’s almost as if you’ll have to drive blindfolded. Sounds unsafe no? But remember that magic bag? It’s actually one you can’t see with the human eye. That bag is simply the divine mix of your intuition, your inner knowing, your unconscious, subconscious, and conscious. It has every single tool you need to get you to your destination. It may not feel like it right now. It may sound confusing and foggy. But you inherintly and intuitively have every single last tool you need to get through this trip and through life as a whole.
You can sit here and ask yourself well what are all of my tools? That’s a question that is not meant for you to ever understand in it’s entirety. Just hold onto the tools you know you have from your past, and remain optimistic in knowing you have an INFINITE amount still unknown. Each new tool will present itself to you at exactly the right time and exactly the right place. I told you it’s magic. This article could be one of those tools. That doesn’t mean you sit around and wait for the answers to find you. No. Start working towards your goal. Now if you say “Well wait, you barely gave me any context! I thought you were going to tell me what I need to do!” Go look at your notebook. You already know the next step to take. You probably know what your next 5 moves should be. Do not second guess yourself. Please please please do not second guess yourself. You may not have it all figured out and that is OK, you’re not meant to! Just be persistent. I assure you, in the midway of making those first one or two steps, that “bag” will open up again without you even trying- at the exact right time and the exact right place and you will be shown yet another step or turn to make that will bring you that much closer to where you want to be.
Remember it’s NOT a race. There is no speed limit. The key is not to go any faster OR slower than you INTUITIVELY know you need to go. Don’t look at the car next to you. Forget about makes and models. Trust that though it may feel like you are driving blindly, there is absolutely nothing to worry about. You’re going to get stuck in traffic. Road rage might creep in from time to time. You may get caught in a few uncomfortable storms. You’ll also have days where you’re riding high and cruising smoothly. You’re on a road trip. Appreciate it. Every single part of it. You’re to make the most of it. Enjoy it.
Read between the lines.
It sounds illusive. Just trust.
All of your answers lie within.
This is an abbreviated version of the Intro and Chapter 1 of a book I’m beginning to write, “The Void of Ouroboros”. If you’re an active reader of mine, maybe even an esoteric one in the distance who hasn’t revealed himself, I hope you know how much I love, care, and appreciate you!
If there is anything I can leave you with: If no one has told you, I am so proud of you. I see you, I hear you, I feel you and I hope you continue to read between the lines. :) ❤
xx,
Jack